Margo's got Moxie ! : the diary of miss red high heels

THE ‘M-E’ ‘ME’ usually refers to oneself in the English language. I find this very coincidental that this also stands for, ‘male ego.’ I think this is the part where I will get severely punished for writing this, but here goes. A man’s ego is important. If you don’t show him how much he matters, well expect to be at the bottom of his priority list or turned into an option. In college, I had some awesome guy friends who in part will probably admit I was pretty scary. Ladies or guys for that matter, if you tower over most men at almost 6 foot as a female inform me on how you handle it lol, and I’ll take notes! (side note, I love being tall!) As a man, petite, short women or men are preferred to boost ego and easier to protect; unless you are the occasional male who wouldn’t mind standing next to an empire state building…alright not that tall, but close. The male ego needs to feel appreciated, wanted, needed, and especially like a hero. Male ego is fragile and can quite easily be misc...

Even though they may not see that I care, it’s wonderful to lie in their arms and not have to worry about a single thing. I just know better because they only want one thing. There cannot be simply cuddling or holding each other and have it be enough. No, it’s as if they have to take it further and ruin it or try pressuring you when you either kick them out, or tell them no. It’s comforting when a man knows you have boundaries and doesn’t cross them. It’s a bonus when there is a mutual understanding and he genuinely cares about you and what you think about them. I think I am one of those individuals who comes home from work with a strain in my neck and back from sitting in an office chair staring at a monitor; and wish that someone would lovingly give me a massage. Going to a massage place is costly especially if you try to do this monthly, it racks up in cost after a while. Maybe it is the romantic side of me, but when I look into their eyes I like to see that they are happy...

I don't know what's harder, the beginning, the middle or the end of something you thought would last. for two weeks I have been sick on and off, and my life things I like doing have been put on hold, no gym, no life group, no bible study, it's been miserable and this week I could only go to work one day because I have pink eye in both eyes, trying to get well again. When I don't get to go anywhere or do anything, I do it anyways. I worked out while sick last week and made it worse. I went to see Iron Man yesterday after work because I needed to get out. I disinfected the apartment periodically and cursed when I saw statuses of people going out and having fun when I'm stuck. during my time in my room, or in the shower, or cleaning, I began to fester about what I could have been doing, what I needed to do, or what happened while I was absent, or about all the people I cared about who maybe forgot about me. Here's the thing, everyone has a hobby, or maybe its a fla...

I went to a college counselor and that is mostly all I had done as far as therapy was concerned. I didn’t really like labels nor do I like the idea of being told that a certain drug may help, when I have never taken them and don’t plan to. However, while creating this master list I felt that spiritually, mentally, and physically, I have plenty of time to grow in this life. I thought maybe since I found a new church to try out a program that is 12 weeks, and do it just because. Self-growth is nothing to be embarrassed about. In fact my friend Bobby and I talked a lot about how people can really benefit from it. Self-growth means being able to take a situation and not react, but respond in a professional, appropriate manner. The most difficult parts of human personalities can be ones weaknesses. I struggle with patience, emotional stability at times, sensitivity, a need to be right, etc. I could keep going, but my intent was to show up to this person, (yes they are a str...

Warning if you are easily offended or bored with social commentary or opinionated reads, I advise you, don’t read this. Forget for a second that you or another person are both afraid you won’t see each other again, or that Aunt Lily won’t recover from cancer. I learned in college from a distinguished English professor, Jason Ludden that fear is something we thrive on or run from; it’s the possibility of the unknown that drives us to insanity. I was writing an English essay for his class on a relationship story. He told me that I can’t just write a paper without diving into the memory of the fears I had at the time. I sat down in his office fuming because I knew what fear was, so why was this so hard to write? I stared at him, clearly annoyed, and decided that I would jot down on a piece of paper what terrified me the most. I came up with a few.  Indiana Jones and I have something in common, we are deathly afraid of snakes, or could it be my other fear, being alone. (This is coming ...

Part of growing up is being able to handle difficult and uncomfortable situations. Adults do it every day. There is a contradiction to the idea of situations and circumstances where people can be mean and ruthless in life. I think there is a boundary for that. I think it is important to be blunt and honest sure, but to an extent. Watch for how feelings are hurt or they will come back to bite you in the butt. I only freely give advice if people ask for it. I am a sensitive person, but at the same time need to learn to take criticism (even if it means it’s not something I want to hear). I love being able to help and take care of people so it makes me appear like a nice individual who genuinely cares because that’s what I want people to see me as. Here’s where I think the lines blur, if someone doesn’t show some effort in a relationship or friendship at all, forget them. I also think considering the source is very important. You wouldn’t go to a butcher for nail care now would you? I won’...

Impatience Out of my weaknesses this may be the one I struggle with the most. I have a minimal span of patience when it comes to certain things in life such as driving, repeating things more than three times, waiting on someone who is an hour late, dealing with incompetent people, and attempting to get a task done without interruption. My impatience cost me a price, I couldn’t just wait until I arrived at the yogurt shop to text a friend or my brother, I had to do it right then in slow close range traffic on Auburn Folsom and I did it because, oh I sure thought I could. I smacked right into a Dodge Truck trailer and destroyed my entire front end and almost got myself killed…. Now hold on a second. It’s Thursday afternoon Valentines day, I have no work the next day, and I am in a giddy mood, distracted by music and social interaction. A clerk at a gas station was trying to charge me twice for my fuel; I firmly told her she had no right to charge a duplicate credit. I lost directions...