Margo's got Moxie ! : the diary of miss red high heels

Blog Pictures dont do justice. My trip to Ireland was the most amazing experience ever. I was going through a lot at home and battered, unforeseen friendships and work stress. I could not wait to get away. We went to Dublin, County Kerry, and Galway. I toured and trekked all over, taking in views Id always dreamed about. I spent time with people I thought id never get along with or meet. We were a tight knit close grohl of nineteen people and all pretty much got along. I loved the scenery and atmosphere of the area and its people. I loved how we could get a drink and it wasn't overly priced like the states. I loved all of the sacred churches open to the public and the beautiful cathedral lining the corner of one town. They say travel is good for the soul. I lived it up there and on my last night, had one last pint with my tour family, laughing, singing, dancing, and crying even cried at dinner. For the past four weeks or so, Id been sad over a guy I liked and wanted a friendship ...

It has always been you.  I will be standing at the airport about to board my plane.  Finishing a workout and heading to my car.  Sipping coffee at the park. Watching a movie or reading a book.   Writing in my diary and fighting back tears smiling because of it all.  Praying before I hit the pillow for bed.  Holding onto memories and thoughts.  Trying to mull over things I never said.  Drinking a beer or dancing to a song.  Sitting at my desk working away.  Cooking in the kitchen or cleaning out the house.  It's always been you.  On my mind and in my heart.  You cannot see it, you do not want it or know it. Or maybe even need it.  Sometimes you gotta say it.  That feeling right there.  Baby please don't forget it.  When I'm looking directly into your eyes I could shout at the top of my lungs, but you won't hear.  I am right here.  I can't wait long. have a plane to catch, ...

When I was still in school, I used to tutor a young guy who hated English. When I mean hate, he really loathed event the thought of working on reading, spelling, grammar, or any of the things, I so very much enjoy. I spent my college years covered in the subject. The poor boy was having a tough time in his class and his parents were worried he wouldn't improve especially since he was an athlete wrestler outside of class. The first few times I came over to tutor him, he would whine about how stupid it was, that he had to have help. His attention span was minimal and his parents mentioned in private he had ADHD. I decided to take a different route and forget the label. One afternoon, I set his textbook down and said let's go outside. He immediately figured the session was over, but agreed to go anyway. We shot some basket hoops in the backyard and I tested his limits by quizzing him on vocabulary and comprehension. The initial reaction was defensive and anger. "You can...

Vulnerability is beautiful. The hard part about it, is exposing the parts of yourself you truely wish to hide from the world and from others. I think so often we are inclined to judge a person's insecurities and faults before we get to know them. Or Maybe its that some push people away in a need to understand themselves and the judgement is a front to illuminate protection. Irregardless of the reason or root cause, love is missing in us and those around us. I am not just saying this because I have a love for the Lord and people in my life, no it is because  we as individuals need to be restored and renewed that we simply are and exist. Rushing through and passing by, this practice makes it difficult to see what we are missing. We don't do it on purpose, but we do it often. Going through the motions, posting on social media how fantastic things are, and running through time. I wonder if we could expose that which we hide. I wonder if we could have a powerful care towards one ano...

It's 1am. You sent a text in the afternoon or no you sent several, and you look at your phone and began to think that you are the problem, that you are the failure, that no one cares, or that no one sees you, or maybe it's just you rolling inside your head. You know you don't mean to, you just triggered, and the spinning has started. Lack of sleep, hard day, or maybe you want to try and cover up that you feel badly of how something went. Negative self talk is one of the most powerful, awful effects of Borderline Personality Disorder. In fact it rules so much, that a regular, successful, beautiful woman, who is already loved, breaks down and becomes what she is not. There a triggers, first it's when they feel threatened or disrespected, or ignored. Really, for everyone once that happens, usually a person lets go, says fuck that person, accepts the situation, and moves on. A person with BPD, in other words, heavy anxiety, doesn't. They hold themselves responsible for ...

I hate when people say that. It's like telling a person who isn't really athletic to jump a treadmill. Usually you don't catch people saying that, then if they do, they weren't taught how to be humble when they were young. I don't know. Good lor, it takes a lot in me to not turn around and snap back. Sure, that sounds like I'm angry, but the reality is, I get tired of hearing it. It could be a relative eager for grandchildren (which I know you want them, but I'm 26, not 38, chill out). I love hearing when someone is going to have a baby or they are expecting, or when someone gets engaged. Please don't peg me as cynical. I am not. I am actually one of the biggest romantics out there. I have come to find and also with a little of my own reading, that early marriage is oober risky. I grew up wanting it more than life itself, someone to share life with, still do. Today, I harp more on trying to do me first. It does nto come without it's challenges! I s...

How amazing this life is truly. Separated by time and space and surrounding areas of change. I took a break from bible study. Worried I would miss out on all of the fun, I wondered if I had made the right choice. With my next trip approaching in almost a month, I knew I had to slow down. I spent the weekend reading, swimming, doing chores, staring at the ceiling, biking, a womens/moms fun game night and a missions potluck. Some of it was spent in front of the television, which was time I felt was not wasted. I used to rent tons of books from the library and had zero time to read any except one. Work can get boring or stressful. What a joy and blessing to be able to check myself a bit and relax. I forget I need some time off too. I am used to the go go Jane and that can be draining week after week. It is my favorite thing to be busy, but it is also nice to just be. The excitment for my trip and also being and seeing my two college buddies Jason and Ashley get hithed this Septemeber ...