Margo's got Moxie ! : the diary of miss red high heels

There are so many articles out there on how to be happy or methods on ways to get rid of the sad or lonely or angry or whatever you feel. I read an article from Elephant Journal (one of my favorite websites to read from) about how to just be who you are in that moment and the best part is, it doesn't have a time limit. Things take time. Grief takes time. Maybe you are depressed because of the time change and waking up this morning was no fun. You pick a few solid go to people and you feel badly about venting to them so you stop venting or you just hide. You stop talking, you try to stop feeling, but your heart doesn't want to lie. The heart doesn't lie, I am willing to bet there are quite a few songs out there about that. People are conditional. They are there when you need them, you exhaust them, they tell you let go get God, they set a boundary (rightfully so, and perfectly acceptable), and then you just disappear. Still learning to not vent to a parent, who apparently ...

I have a roommate I have a roommate. She's hairy and sweet. Tiny and cuddly. Cute and understanding. She is elated when I come home and when I am scolding her she feels badly for disappointing me. I have a roommate who when I am bawling my eyes out or screaming mad, or super happy charges into me and stays close. I have a roommate who when everyone else tries to fix you, change you, forget you, judge you, ignore you, push you, laugh at you, lie to you, leave you, yell at you, or anything at all, she just falls into you like big warm hug and holds on. I have a roommate when it seems like even though everything is well and I have it all good and I should not complain, and that I need to be the bigger person, or try somethin new, or suck it up, own it, fake it to make it,  etc, that she is taken care of and loves me through it all. I have a roommate that when I am depressed, or in angst or fear, or worry, she jumps in my lap. My little five o clock shadow when everything is right or...

I don't believe in good byes remember..... I believe in see you later or until next time. Coming to terms with goodbye is like having your lunch taken from you, or finding out you deleted all the best of a TV series off your dvr without intention, or getting your fingers slammed in the car door. It flat out sucks either way, shape or form. I am a woman of closure, but with that comes the weakness of not being able to tell it like it is, but that is essentially what I need to hear. Sugarcoating and falsities I have no room for. I have no room for childishness or tirade or fear. Grateful for honesty and introspection, intimacy and connection. I have such great friends and a lot of times the bullhead in me doesn't listen at all. I like to do things my way and wind up back to square one wondering how in the heck I thought it was a good idea at the time. March is a weird month. It's beginning of spring, new plans, and also St. Patrick's day, which makes me wa...