Adult Coloring Books, March Madness, Vacation obsessed.. is it St. Pattys yet?


I don't believe in good byes remember..... I believe in see you later or until next time. Coming to terms with goodbye is like having your lunch taken from you, or finding out you deleted all the best of a TV series off your dvr without intention, or getting your fingers slammed in the car door. It flat out sucks either way, shape or form. I am a woman of closure, but with that comes the weakness of not being able to tell it like it is, but that is essentially what I need to hear. Sugarcoating and falsities I have no room for. I have no room for childishness or tirade or fear. Grateful for honesty and introspection, intimacy and connection. I have such great friends and a lot of times the bullhead in me doesn't listen at all. I like to do things my way and wind up back to square one wondering how in the heck I thought it was a good idea at the time.

March is a weird month. It's beginning of spring, new plans, and also St. Patrick's day, which makes me want to be back in Ireland more than ever. They have a huge celebration of course and here I think there are enough Irish pubs to go to to make sure I am not really that far away after all.
Waiting for my Germany trip is so challenging. Every small trip to Colorado, L.A. Reno, Tahoe, WA, Oregon, Vegas, Boston etc I have to turn down or turn away to save or try to save for these summer trips. My last payment for Germany is next month thank the lord! Wait a journey of crazy and still paying off the Europe one till July. Monthly payments are far better than pay in full.

Moxie think of all the blessings.. .. Mia loves her toys, I have a job and it's not management lol, Sunday school is engaging and wonderful. Thanks to a dear friend I carry around a cool adult coloring book (ok chill not that kind sicko!) that I use when I have anxiety or I need a break. I managed to make it through the week on little to nothing in the fridge and we get paid tomorrow. Hugs are my favorite thing ever. I made a list, a special list. One I don't share with anyone. This list is my fun events and such with things I only want to do with them. I am hopeful of my own ending.
If you catch me out on the trail, or out and about, I pray one thing.. love. L-O-V-E even if you have nothing to give, or if you are laughed at, judged, or left, do not lose heart. I typically would have a joke for this, or I know the guys would.

With work feeling less passionate, drained, and preoccupied with thoughts of travel.. restore my soul, restore my heart. I took a walk and thought of it all. I smiled and I know I won't forget. I hope all of you don't either whatever it is. What is it.. don't be sad cause it's over.. smile cause it happened! Indirectly, when they wear something you gave them, still have something you made, gave, whatever, you hope, hey maybe they will think of me. So I am not asking or telling, I am hoping. To my friend, screw goodbye.  good luck and ... TTFN even better <3

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