Latenite scribbles into today: come right out and say it

Not everyone is going to be direct and honest. Silent people can be interesting but in my opinion sometimes silence is hurtful and dangerous if gone undetected. Say what you mean and mean what you say. I think everyone does need their space and not everyone responds well to personal attack. However, if they ask for your thoughts, sugarcoating it won't make it any easier. At some point, you will alienate and disappoint people you didn't intend to piss off and those folks who push you away and run for good weren't there to stay to begin with. Or another is, you will wonder if a guy or girl is interested and don't feel you should chase them and think the impersonal mode of texting is nothing but nerve racking. I overthink a lot of things. I have to say we are some of the best minds when we do that, but it takes a toll on our mental and emotional capacity overall if you let it! Funny thing is, I get teased for putting an extra place setting at my table at dinner. People ask me, neigbors stare. Who is it for? I used to say as a child it was for my future husband. I would get all excited and say he would come for tea. As I got into college and my cooking skills improved from plastic toy ware to real dishes and edible meals, I began to change my place setting. I made it for friends, colleagues, my bfs, or people I was just getting to know. Sometimes I would make a place setting for the big man upstairs himself. As the years went by, it became apparent I was giving of myself all too much. Burnt out and confused, the placemat disappeared and I didn't bother to set a place even for me. I got lazy and focused on quick to go meals or tupperware ones. I forgot the joy of cooking a meal from start to finish or sharing with friends. It is quiet in the apartment. I pour myself a beer and I set the table. Tonight I put another setting next to my own, maybe for grandma, maybe for God. The attention is crying out maybe or I am sharing a meal without even knowing. We get so burnt up and hell bent on being something to someone like it is going to solve all are fucking problems( yes I went Jennifer Lawrence right there). Sometimes I become so bogged down with dissatisfaction and this need for something or someone else when that isn't a solution. I challenge myself to find positive qualities in my friends, my circumstances, my life. I believe I am a beautiful spirit that has been created for some purpose.  I felt like my life was on hold and I wanted change right away. I am an action taker, so I feel better when busy and industrious. There is a time to act and then there is a time to not act. You cannot control other people. I will eventually learn to accept what is. For now, the cookies need out of the oven, and the food put away.