Lakemont, stalemate with family, and that waiting for you

Lakemont Pines is one of my favorite places to go to up north in the Sierras. I am lucky to have family aka grandpa now (grandma passed) who lives up there in a nice cabin. Swarming mosquitoes come mid afternoon and the bullfrogs at night, provide that back country feel, as well as the fishing everyone does at the lake itself. People take out paddle boards, paddle boats, inner tubes, rafts, noodles, etc to swim and frolick in the water. The water is green, but looks crystal green in the light. The stars are really beautiful at night when the lights are out, and when you sit on his deck, you can see bats flying all around. I love fourth of July up there. Although, sky fireworks are banned due to common forest fires, the ground ones they shoot off the dock are just as good. My grandpa sat with us on a beach lawn chair and watched them with us. He is doing well considering he is 85 and still has superb hearing! He loves to watch tv, and a lot of it. I am not too much of a fan, especially when I am up there. I try to catch up on reading or just plain go outside. Mia tried out the SUP paddleboard and did well. She didn't bark or freak, jumped in on second try, and even looked around to the other folks out in the water. Lakemont is my happy place, my safe haven, and second home it seems, other than friend's houses ;). I like to be able to come to that spot and completely disconnect from reality. I take hikes up to the Top of the World and spend time with grandpa, cook them meals, make an adventure, walk Mia in the woods etc. Lakemont Association did well with their beach and a lot of people were up this year. I would argue his cabin though, is the best on the lake. He has some pretty good neighbors. Good place to retire for my parents maybe one day.

Time flies though. He always ask if I am getting married, or have a boyfriend, or going to have kids. He whines a bit to my siblings and I that he and father time are running out, and he wants grand kids etc. I often feel the need to discuss something else at that point, and some arguments start. Stalemate with family can began as soon as 2 or 3 days, within staying with one another in same vicinity. As much as I like spending time with my parents and grandpa, it began to wear after a bit. When my aunt and uncle showed last night, I was completely wiped, so whatever I said, wasn't really the nicest! The stalemate isn't usually on purpose, I am tired, agitated and ready to leave them from the time spent. I need my own space too. I do like that they travel a lot during summer and often tag along, but it can get to be a lot especially when I have commitments of my own, or someone (no name calling) has a need to be right a lot and so on. You reach a point at which you part ways after a vacation, not bitter, just ready for some downtime. Sometimes relatives can be a handful, they don't mean to, just as they age, they can be.

A message to you if you exist... That whole waiting for you thing is starting to frustrate me. I am horrible with patience. Downright horrible. It's like I want you to get here already because my family is aging. Maybe it's cause the pressure is on, and I don't want you to miss out on meeting them either, or maybe cause it's also because I am too I guess putting pressure. I honestly don't think it's going to happen. As my friends say the same damn speech over and over again, I get it. I am too busy though, I also have Mia and family, so maybe I don't need you. Maybe you were never a plan... I don't know, but I will keep writing to you with the idea that you exist.

Wherever you are.....
Moxie out to get the day rollin...