Making the most of it and hotel living

In between homes and a place to stay. It has felt like Mia and I have been on one big vacation that we intend to be home soon. Although, the freedom has worn off and reality has settled in. I don’t know much of anyone yet, except work people. I encouraged myself Sunday to find a church. I pushed to attend two different church services and found that Rancho Bernardo Community Church was the place to be. Although much bigger than FOPC sadly, I embraced the idea of it being home once more as a Presbyterian haven for a newbie. I grabbed a form to become or try to be a teacher for little ones again and reached out to group leaders to join a book study and events.

 The hotel has been great and the free meals, much needed. The staff is welcoming and accommodating. Mia has found the space to sleep and be okay with it. I, however, have taken a little longer. The tenants upstairs are loud and I hardly sleep fully and soundly. I am making do and meeting random people who some I may never see again. I did make one friend at a Brewery and she invited me to a gathering this week; hoping that pans out. My birthday was last week and I was showered lovingly with special gifts, cards, and even flowers for Valentine’s Day from my man. I cannot still help but feel this is not home quiet yet. I pray once we are in the apartment and things are set up, I will feel here and present. Maybe it is just my mind lately. I have felt irritated with the smallest things. I can’t blame it on my time of my month because that is henceforth inevitable.

 At work, it is truly different. We talk here and there, but not as much as back at home. The admins here are snappy, and they don’t really help as much as I thought. You more do things or find things on your own or don’t receive them at all. Work folks are nice, but some people are starting to roll of the program, so not sure what is happening, but maybe that is okay. I think I am just not used to an ebb and flow of change in a place I am unfamiliar with. That is alright. What I need to be okay with is myself and Mia, and our world here. The adjustment of keeping in contact with those far away, and not having the closeness of those dear currently, (minus siblings) has still taken some getting used to.

   I spent my birthday with to-go Olive Garden on an ottoman, beer, wine and a margarita, Scooby Doo: Spooky Island on tv, and Mia in my lap. The weather was stormy and rainy, and at first I felt selfish and angry I didn’t get a real party. I was surrounded by love all over my room, with people’s thoughts and care towards me even if they weren’t actually there in the room with me. Work is challenging now, and taxing on the brain. Management is different, and maybe I am different too. The boys will teach me the ways of the program soon I hope. For now, it’s training and soaking up the time I have till Robbie returns from his honeymoon. They say if you don’t like where you are, change your life, but I have not given this place a chance. I need to try. I said the same about Fair Oaks and look where that took me. I can make the most of it, I just need more time and to look for lovely around me.