Hey woman clock is ticking (as if!) and other misc thoughts
I hate when people say that. It's like telling a person who isn't really athletic to jump a treadmill. Usually you don't catch people saying that, then if they do, they weren't taught how to be humble when they were young. I don't know. Good lor, it takes a lot in me to not turn around and snap back. Sure, that sounds like I'm angry, but the reality is, I get tired of hearing it. It could be a relative eager for grandchildren (which I know you want them, but I'm 26, not 38, chill out). I love hearing when someone is going to have a baby or they are expecting, or when someone gets engaged. Please don't peg me as cynical. I am not. I am actually one of the biggest romantics out there.
I have come to find and also with a little of my own reading, that early marriage is oober risky. I grew up wanting it more than life itself, someone to share life with, still do. Today, I harp more on trying to do me first. It does nto come without it's challenges! I still want a guy to text me back, to want to hang out, and be really into me, oh do I. The thing is, if it's right, I won't have to berate myself on all of my flaws, but rejoice in them. And if the right person doesn't show up, I have a wonderful family, and good group of friends to get me there. I have seen divorces, from corgial ones, to nasty, heartbreaking ones. I don't know why some people are so eager to get married, or maybe it's cause they feel like enough is enough, this dating thing sucks, we are friends, I like him, he likes me, let's just do it, or sex desires. no idea what the deal is. No offense, but please don't come crying to us when you need his approval to go out, or when you are now a team, it's not just you, doing you.
I know what you are probably thinking. What a bitch, who says that, or you don't know anything until you get there. No, your right I don't. Everyone has stuff to go through, and you say you are so glad to be out of the dating world, and never alone. What about being alone in marriage, or alone with children? It irks me to no end when people throw in the towel and assume that if it's not easy why do it. My clock isn't ticking, for some it is. It has a different rhthym. Everyone's ticking (excuse the metaphor) is going to be at a certain time. The ticking is relative to our sense of time in life. We panic thinking we all have to be at the same pace. Wrong. If that were the case, I would be hanging out with the saved by the bell crew, or the cast of Steel Magnolias!
I would like to take my time. It may not seem like it and I may not show or emulate that well enough, but I want to focus on making that effort to simply try. Man shopping. That sounds so rude. No, I hate shopping. I like reading, I'm reading the books. I am reading the books before I check them out.. work with me here.. I am reading the excerpts, and I wonder if they will be interesting. What will my expectations be versus reality. I have a lot going on and lately I find if I type it out when super angry or upset, I try not to send that out to the universe lol. I'm improving on my ability to not send those and also to make room for the reality of other's choices. It's okay for me to think in my mind what I feel, but not everybody and their mother needs to hear the big long schpeal. My triggers are definitely anger and texting. I typically do not understand so I get edgy or run amok because I want an answer even if no answer exists. Part of the process of dating though, is being able to figure out more of what I need and want even if somehting doesn't work out. Least, then I will know what to continue to steer clear from and what to look for in the future. My goal is to spend less time trying to fix someone (therapy learning curve) and more time appreciating what I can learn as a whole from it all.
I hear divorced men make good lovers and divorced women make good wives. Interesting. I don't plan on anything, but working my program for now. Lunch breaks before heading back to work, enjoy!
I have come to find and also with a little of my own reading, that early marriage is oober risky. I grew up wanting it more than life itself, someone to share life with, still do. Today, I harp more on trying to do me first. It does nto come without it's challenges! I still want a guy to text me back, to want to hang out, and be really into me, oh do I. The thing is, if it's right, I won't have to berate myself on all of my flaws, but rejoice in them. And if the right person doesn't show up, I have a wonderful family, and good group of friends to get me there. I have seen divorces, from corgial ones, to nasty, heartbreaking ones. I don't know why some people are so eager to get married, or maybe it's cause they feel like enough is enough, this dating thing sucks, we are friends, I like him, he likes me, let's just do it, or sex desires. no idea what the deal is. No offense, but please don't come crying to us when you need his approval to go out, or when you are now a team, it's not just you, doing you.
I know what you are probably thinking. What a bitch, who says that, or you don't know anything until you get there. No, your right I don't. Everyone has stuff to go through, and you say you are so glad to be out of the dating world, and never alone. What about being alone in marriage, or alone with children? It irks me to no end when people throw in the towel and assume that if it's not easy why do it. My clock isn't ticking, for some it is. It has a different rhthym. Everyone's ticking (excuse the metaphor) is going to be at a certain time. The ticking is relative to our sense of time in life. We panic thinking we all have to be at the same pace. Wrong. If that were the case, I would be hanging out with the saved by the bell crew, or the cast of Steel Magnolias!
I would like to take my time. It may not seem like it and I may not show or emulate that well enough, but I want to focus on making that effort to simply try. Man shopping. That sounds so rude. No, I hate shopping. I like reading, I'm reading the books. I am reading the books before I check them out.. work with me here.. I am reading the excerpts, and I wonder if they will be interesting. What will my expectations be versus reality. I have a lot going on and lately I find if I type it out when super angry or upset, I try not to send that out to the universe lol. I'm improving on my ability to not send those and also to make room for the reality of other's choices. It's okay for me to think in my mind what I feel, but not everybody and their mother needs to hear the big long schpeal. My triggers are definitely anger and texting. I typically do not understand so I get edgy or run amok because I want an answer even if no answer exists. Part of the process of dating though, is being able to figure out more of what I need and want even if somehting doesn't work out. Least, then I will know what to continue to steer clear from and what to look for in the future. My goal is to spend less time trying to fix someone (therapy learning curve) and more time appreciating what I can learn as a whole from it all.
I hear divorced men make good lovers and divorced women make good wives. Interesting. I don't plan on anything, but working my program for now. Lunch breaks before heading back to work, enjoy!
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