I have a roommate

I have a roommate
I have a roommate. She's hairy and sweet. Tiny and cuddly. Cute and understanding. She is elated when I come home and when I am scolding her she feels badly for disappointing me. I have a roommate who when I am bawling my eyes out or screaming mad, or super happy charges into me and stays close. I have a roommate who when everyone else tries to fix you, change you, forget you, judge you, ignore you, push you, laugh at you, lie to you, leave you, yell at you, or anything at all, she just falls into you like big warm hug and holds on. I have a roommate when it seems like even though everything is well and I have it all good and I should not complain, and that I need to be the bigger person, or try somethin new, or suck it up, own it, fake it to make it,  etc, that she is taken care of and loves me through it all. I have a roommate that when I am depressed, or in angst or fear, or worry, she jumps in my lap. My little five o clock shadow when everything is right or when it is not. My roommate who pees on the carpet thinking its okay and chews some of clothes when she knows I don't like it. I have a roommate who stretches like a yoga cat in the am and wanders around the kitchen for extra scraps and finds more toys to throw about. I have a roommate when its us against the world and when hiding and being real and vulnerable are all I have and all I am and when I am tired of trying and hiding. I have a roommate who knows every little thing I do. As she sleeps on a special blanket we both cherish so much, I know I wouldn't have it any other way. I have a roommate who hates when I leave her side, who knows when dinner time is, who loves snuggling and watching movies on the couch. I have a roommate who is terrified of the vaccuum and barks at it to protect me. I have a roommate when my friends just dont understand or try to and are tired of me. I have a roommate and she is a 9.4 lb yorkie mix furbaby DOG. All you need is love and a dog. Truth is, Im gonna be more than okay. My roommate is remarkable because she is shaping me and reminding me pain is temporary, learning to regret nothing; she is teaching me to forgive aka when she disobeys not to get mad but to simply be able to go oh oopsies, and then clean up the stain or throw away the battered sock. My roommate is showing me to learn to let go and stop fighting the pain and the old. She is helping me love them or anyone from afar and not fighting them on what they cannot give. A quote by John Lennon, “There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.” 
Pain and frustration and loss and love and confusion, and strength shape you. I don't regret a damn thing. I am worthy like it or not, I am. Moxie signing off to find sleep.

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