Sandra Dee becomes Sandy (written my jr yr of college)

All my life, I grew up very conservative and well with stick up my rear end, closed off to everything either being sheltered from the world or unbeknownst to it.  It was sin to do things that in my learning, was biblically wrong, or sinful.  I was the epitome of the Sandra Dee stage for Sandy in Grease. I was going to wait to have sex on my wedding night and I was never going to drink unless it was wine and beer at dinner nor would I get drunk. Smokers should be removed, and a lesson taught, I thought. Going out clubbing, or staying up till 3am growing up was unheard of, and I never tried it. I also was so set on getting my way and trying control everyone and anyone in my wake. How exhaustingly awful. As a freshman in college I was exposed to everything in a different light. Friends and my roommates this year (names held for confidentiality) broke the mold which was the old me. I refused to drink until I was 21. Two weeks before my birthday sophomore year, I had a blast with friends just having Dr. Pepper and rum for the first time. I had my 21^st birthday and drank legitimately for the first time, and didn’t wake up feeling like I had done something wrong or sinned anymore.  I am a junior this year, and the person I was when I first moved into Nye Hall two years ago, is not the same. I read the Sagebrush a lot and Tara Browser changed how I think. I don’t want to be Sandra Dee anymore. Of course for some, there’s nothing wrong with that. For me, there was. God designed man to be with woman, but he never said, the poor guy was your first and it would be his too. Reality 101 yes there are men out there who are virgins, but who ever said you had to wait to find that one? If we set up so much expectations, as my mother taught me, it only sets you up for failure. I’m not saying settle for drunken joe at the local bar, but a guy whom you love or like, and trust.  I’m curious about being able to say I am ready, and to stand in front of that person you care about and not be scared but comfortable and cared even if you are living in the moment. For college students or UNR folks, think about how nice it is to celebrate wining the Cal football game having drinks with friends, or going dancing at a club, and I guess for me not worrying about how much trouble I’d be in with the creator, but to let go, and be me. I was changed. I’m not the same person anymore. The other night I was getting ready for an evening out with some friends, getting dolled up (as every girl should be encouraged to do) and Christina was listening to me ramble about the latest news and a smile formed on her face. Virginity as Browser states is a thing of the past and your world changes by experience. I live in a house, cook everything you can think of, fallen in love before with a guy who helped me loosen up, and relax, and have been shown love, and stayed up till 4am in lieu of a drunken trip to Denney’s with friends. I work out everyday unless sick or very tired. I see a kid smoking a cigarette outside Canada Hall and wave at him, recognizing a familiar face. I don’t smoke per my choice, but just my tolerance and acceptance has changed. The control was gone. Of course I still become stressed with school, like any other student, and I am still sensitive, but learning. A lot of my friends are in their early to late 20s and the innocence that was Sandra Dee is gone. I am Sandy, well in my case a new Margo. Tell me about it stud!